Marriage In A Slump? 5 Things To Get Out Of The Emotional Rut

Marriage In A Slump? 5 Things To Get Out Of The Emotional Rut

Marriages have seasons. Matter of fact, Dr. Gary Chapman (the author of The 5 Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate) wrote a book about this very topic. It’s called The 4 Seasons of Marriage: Secrets to a Lasting Marriage. In it, he compares the ups and downs of marriage with spring, summer, autumn and winter. (It’s a good read. Check it out when you get a chance.)

If your marriage is feeling a little “chilly” right now, don’t let it stress you out too much. That happens sometimes. The key is to recognize it, accept it for what it is and then sit down with your wife to discuss what you can do to get back on track.

If she looks at you like “I don’t know, I was hoping you would have some suggestions”, for your sake, we’re on top of that. Here are some tips for how you can get out of your marriage slump and get the fire back into your relationship.

Have A Staycation

Can’t afford to take a vacation right now? Whether the money is low or there’s very little wiggle room in your schedule for time off, you can still “get away” from the comfort of your own home or city. It’s called a staycation. 

If you have kids, send them to a family member or some friends for the weekend and chill out at home. Order movies. Make some of your favorite foods and camp out on your living room or bedroom floor. Or, spend a night or two at a hotel or bed and breakfast in your area. There’s something romantic and refreshing about sleeping (and other things) in a new place. A place that you don’t have to clean up once you’re done. Sometimes a change of scenery, even if it’s not far from home, is just what your marriage needs.

Take A Walk Down Memory’s Lane

Nostalgia can be the ultimate aphrodisiac! When’s the last time the two of you went to the restaurant where you had your first date? Or went to the spot where you first said “I love you”? Or revisited where you proposed to your lady? Sometimes, in order to appreciate what you currently have, the best remember is to remember where you’ve been…and how far you’ve come.

Create A Marriage Vision Board Together

OK, this might sounds really chick-arts-and-crafts like, but give it a shot! A vision board is basically a collage of pictures that symbolize the goals and plans that you have. A lot of people make them once a year. When your marriage is in a slump, it can be exciting to put your heads together and come up with ideas of things you want to accomplish in the months ahead. Maybe taking an international trip, buying a new car or starting a business together. Suddenly vision boards seem like a good idea, huh? (Click here for tips on how to make one of your own.)

Go On A Marriage Retreat

Studies indicate that married couples increase their chances of marital success by as much as 30 to 35 percent if they see a counselor. A marriage retreat falls in line with this because it does two things: it gives you time away to focus on each other and it helps you to get tips from marriage experts on how to make your marriage stronger. Click here for a list of some of the best retreats in the country.

Spice Up Your Intimate Life

Sex is meant to be a beautiful and NON-BORING experience. If it’s the same way, in the same room at the same time, all of the time—both of you are going to get tired of that at some point. Remember how excited you were when you first started being intimate? What was it? Bring some of that back by being spontaneous. Email her a hotel room reservation. Buy her some lingerie in your favorite color. Flirt with her like you used to via text all throughout the day. Give her a massage. Then draw her a bubble bath and join her. It’s hard to be ho-hum about your marriage when your sex life is on fire! Words to live by.

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